When Playing BIG, Old "Stuff" Will Come UP - Small Business Coach, Women Business Coaching - Client Attraction

When Playing BIG, Old “Stuff” Will Come UP

Fabienne Fredrickson
October 16, 2009

Many people have massive doubt about their ability to do something really big in this world, including myself up until recently. They wonder whether they have what it takes or whether they’re “good enough.” And recently, I talked to you about taking the great leap of faith, really expanding your vision of what’s possible for your business, for your clients and for yourself, and ‘Going BIG or Going HOME’.

Now… that’s all well and good, but what about ALL the emotions that arise when you take a great big leap of faith and step into your purpose? No one ever prepares us for that and it can be an uncomfortable process. You see, when you decide to step into your future in a BIG way, unexpected internal stuff comes up, even stuff you thought you’d ALREADY dealt with.

I’ve gone through this each time I was about to cross the threshold to the next level. You see, BEFORE we make a decision to go BIG, we have to get over our fear of failing miserably. But once we’ve actually made the decision to play a bigger game, then it makes way for lots of other feelings to come up.

As I was getting ready to launch a new direction of my company, along with a new branding, I was surprised to see lots of “old stuff” come up, despite all the mindset work I’ve done. I want to share some of it with you too, because as YOU begin to recognize your potential for magnificence in business and otherwise, and then act upon it, stuff might come up for you too (in fact, it inevitably will).

Here’s a snapshot of what came up for me about a year ago:

“Will they really want what I’m going to be offering?”
“Perhaps I should just keep doing what I’ve been doing for years. At least I know I’m good at that.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t ‘break what ain’t broke’; I mean, I’m doing really well now, why rock the boat?”
“What if I fail and humiliate myself in front of thousands of people. It’s not worth it.”
“What if they reject my new idea?”
“Can I really be THIS big?”
“Do I really have it within me to DO this?”
“I’m scared.”

Just telling you about what came up for me back then makes me feel icky inside. But here’s what I also observed. When you break it down, there really are only 2 emotions in the world: Love and Fear. And there are origins for each of those emotions.

Love comes from your higher self, Spirit, Universe, God (whatever you want to call it.) Love is safe, there is trust there, and it’s synonymous with Faith. And when you have faith, you cannot express fear. They cannot exist in the same place. And your source WANTS you to grow, to be bigger, to dare to dream an even bigger dream. In fact, Spirit is always championing you to get to the next level, if you’ll just get out of the way.

Fear, on the other hand, comes from the ego. And the ego only wants to keep you small, to keep you “safe” by slowing down your progress, by stopping you, by keeping you under its thumb. This is the only way that your ego can survive, and it’s by controlling you and keeping you down. Yuck.

Now, go back up to the list of things I was thinking and feeling last year and review them. You’ll see that every one of them is based in fear. Which means that each of them is ego-driven.

But here’s what you must know: fear doesn’t really exist! Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. And it’s a bunch of nonsense, if you’re willing to look beyond the fear as just a protection mechanism to keep you small. Who wants to be bullied by some little creepy ego to stay small anyway? Not me!

So if you can recognize that what you’re experiencing or feeling is NOT REAL, then it cannot have a hold on you. And that’s what I recognized last year. And I chose to go for it anyway. I hope you will too.

Your Client Attraction Assignment:

Notice what thoughts and emotions come up as you make a commitment to walk boldly into the next step in your business and purpose for being self-employed. Make a list. Write them down. Then, as you read your list, in the margin, I’d like you to label that emotion. 1) Love, or 2) Fear. Which is it based on? I’ll bet just about anything that it’s based on fear.

When you recognize this, you can choose to stay in fear or recognize that you are being “played” by your ego and that it doesn’t actually exist. That all this is fake. And you can choose to act in spite of what’s come up for you.

Listen; let’s admit that this will happen a lot more in the beginning. But when you see this happen over and over again, and you recognize it, the hold the ego has on you will begin to diminish considerably. (It has with me, and each time I step into my next level, the fear is much smaller.)

Now, imagine yourself standing at the doorway of your BIG vision and future. You’ve got your hand on the doorknob. You’re ready to step in but you hear “voices” behind you begging you to play small and stay safe. Inside though, you know that these are all smoke and mirrors, that they’re not real.

You have two options: 1) Walk through the door anyway, because you have no choice but to be your best self and stop playing a mediocre game. Or 2) Stay small because of fear, living a beige existence for the rest of your life. You choose.

Personally, I’m walking through. And I’m betting on my faith that it will turn out OK, if not WAY better than OK. The alternative is just not acceptable. What about you? What will you do? I’m hoping you walk through that door with me.

I’m here for you to make it happen, safely and with all the support you need.

Now that you’re ready to play bigger, no matter what, don’t forget that you’ll need really compelling marketing to get your message across. If you’re not sure where to start or your current marketing plan isn’t working very well, then it’s time to take action and invest in a step-by-step marketing system that will feel easy and authentic to you. The Client Attraction Home Study System? avoids all the unnecessary stuff and instead gives you the most important things to do to find your niche, get out there in a big way, set up simple, solid systems, so you consistently fill your pipeline and continually get new clients. It’s all step-by-step, not a big mishmash of things. So, you do step one of the system, and when you’re done with that, you move on to step two, and so on. So easy. All the tools, scripts, templates, and examples are handed to you on a silver platter. You can get it at TheClientAttractionSystem.com.

Want to use this article on your website or your own ezine?

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Fabienne Fredrickson, The Client Attraction Mentor, is founder of the Client Attraction System?, the proven step-by-step program that shows you exactly how to attract more clients, in record time…guaranteed. To get your F.R.E.E. Audio CD by mail and receive her weekly marketing & success mindset articles on attracting more high-paying clients and dramatically increasing your income, visit www.ClientAttraction.com.

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